


Once I Wake Up

by Hazk



Category: One Piece
Genre: Canon Compliant, Cleaned up version, Dreams and Nightmares, Gen, Loss of Control, Mystery, Pre-Time Skip, Suspense
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-04
Updated: 2017-04-16
Packaged: 2018-04-12 20:07:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 15,748
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4492974
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hazk/pseuds/Hazk
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's no good way to tell when one is dreaming and when not, so maybe that's the explanation to it all... But if it's all real, how can Luffy get his crew back?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. moments too Late

**Author's Note:**

> The first multichapter fic I ever finished, originally posted to ff.net (~2013). Some parts have been re-written and cleaned up, but the story is still the same - and just as confusing as before.

_"What - I-is that..? T-that has to be the lighthouse those villagers were talking about-! HEY GUYS, I CAN SEE THE ISLAND!" Usopp yelled down from the crow's nest. Everyone aboard the ship perked up immediately and began running around, getting ready to land. They were excited to finally get on firm ground and hopefully out of the suffocating darkness that they had already become way too familiar with._

_The Thousand Sunny and her crew had been stuck within a thick mist for the past days and that had taken down the whole crew’s spirits. They hadn't been able to see the sun or the stars for so long now._

_With their Log Pose having been the only thing guiding them onward, they had sailed ever so cautiously to avoid any sudden changes in their surroundings and the seafloor. The last thing they needed was to crash their ship or – if they hadn't been actively watching the Log Pose - pass the island and be stuck in the mist for any longer than necessary._

_Usopp watched the light of the lighthouse flash through the mist that was now slowly beginning to retreat from around them to reveal the island and the sharp rocks surrounding it - It was a good thing he had been alert to see the light._

_The rest of the Straw Hats on deck looked up at the clearing sky and the rejoiced as the sun's rays were finally able to reach them through the thinning mist._

_They sure had missed the sun._

 

* * *

 

Robin followed a path leading towards a thick forest near the spot where the crew had anchored the Thousand Sunny. The island they had landed on was a summer one and it was filled with trees and flowers.

The atmosphere was both beautiful and calming.

Robin couldn't help but to take one deep breath after another as the pressure the mist had caused was finally being lifted. She had been just as glad as everyone else to see the sunlight, the effect the mist had had on the whole crew, herself included, having not been enjoyable in the least.

It hadn't been too long since the crew arrived to the Florian Triangle and had their adventures in Thriller Bark.

Once Brook joined the crew, and they began their journey towards the very end of the Paradise of Grand Line, they had thought that to be the end of the foggy weather.

Of course they had been wrong.

The next island they had arrived at after Thriller Bark had been a rather small one just next to the corner of the Triangle. They had checked over their supplies and injuries there and in less than a day the Log Pose had been set, leaving the crew ready to sail once more.

Before they left they had asked the villagers there what the next island would be like but no one had had much to say on the matter.

What they had managed to figure out was that the next island was named Dunlic and it would only take a day or two to reach it from where they then were. Dunlic was supposedly well known for rain, misty weather and villagers who rather enjoyed not being bothered by anyone, not even their own next-door neighbors.

They also found out that the villagers did still have a sweet spot for well-paying travelers, as long as they weren't bothersome in any way. That’s why the people there couldn't care less if you were a pirate or not, everyone was the same to them as long as money and peace was involved.

That had been good news for the Straw Hat crew and they had been looking forward to reaching the island and the few days long break from sailing it would give them.

The first thing Robin had seen once they reached Dunlic had been an old lighthouse on the top of a high cliff. The villagers on the previous island had mentioned that the lighthouse would be a good warning sign of them getting near the island if the mist happened to be extremely thick around Dunlic and its dangerously rocky surroundings when they arrived.

This information ended up being very helpful as without the lighthouse, the Straw Hat crew would have been in big trouble.

Robin looked over the trees and saw the very top of the lighthouse guiding her forward. She was going to go and take a look at the building as to her it seemed like a good starting point to get to know the new island. She also really wanted to take a nice long walk before returning back to the rest of the crew.

The rest of the crew was going their own way to get more information about both Dunlic and the other islands that were yet to come to. They were also busy refilling their supplies although it was more than likely that they were going to spend quite some time on this island if the misty weather it was so well known for wasn't going to drive them off.

They needed to take some much needed time off before continuing their travels, especially because Zoro who was still severely wounded from Thriller Bark.

All in all, Robin knew she was in no hurry to investigate the whole island and for now she would just take her time to enjoy the peace it had to offer. Those days before they had been released from the mist's clutches had been very tiresome and even Luffy hadn’t seemed able to find any reasons to run around the ship.

The ship had been way too quiet for any of the Straw Hats' liking, and the experience had been one they didn't want to go through ever again if they could help it.

"Robin! Wait!"

The yell came from behind a small hill between the forest and the coastline.

Robin turned to look at the top of the hill just as her captain ran over it in full speed. She noted that his voice hadn't quite reached the same level of enthusiasm it usually held but it wasn't too far gone.

Those five days of mist had taken their toll on every single one of them but it wouldn't take long until they were all back the way they were, Robin was certain about that.

"Where are you going?" Luffy asked as he caught up with her and managed to stop running just in time to not bump into the trees. Robin smiled at him and turned to point up at the lighthouse that was now barely visible through the thick leaves of the forest.

"I was thinking of taking a look at the lighthouse."

Luffy looked up at the lighthouse with a thoughtful frown on his face.

"Would you like to come with me?" Robin asked politely, already knowing what the answer would be. She had nothing against her captain joining her and she knew that eventually he would get either bored or hungry and run off anyway.

Luffy thought about Robin's suggestion for a total of three seconds before grinning at her.

"Yeah, sure! There might be something really interesting up there!"

Robin nodded as she agreed with him completely. "Indeed, there very well might be. We have almost reached the Red Line and we are close to the New World, too. Who knows what we might find from a place such as this."

And so the pirate captain and the archaeologist walked through the forest while following paths that looked like they hadn't been used in years. The trees surrounding them were tall and covered in deep-green leaves and so was the undergrowth. Even the flowers were rather small in size yet beautiful in detail, although their colors too were dusky.

Both Robin and Luffy enjoyed this refreshing environment, compared to the mist, and the sunlight that warmed both them and the forest surrounding them.

Luffy hummed a slow rhythm and looked around while his eyes shined with interest towards every detail of the old forest. He was trying his best to keep his focus on all it had to offer, like the different kinds of plants, to stop himself from rushing forward.

Robin wondered how long Luffy would actually be able to keep doing that and she couldn't help but to smile fondly as she watched him. She had missed this side of her captain, the man who tried his best to match her pace when there was no need to run.

 

* * *

 

It took Robin and Luffy a little under ten minutes to reach the end of the path and get out of the forest.

There were a few trees and bushes here and there on the hillside leading up towards the lighthouse, which was now fully in their view. They could feel the sea breeze's rather chilly caress on their skin the higher up they climbed. The breeze wasn't strong but one could still hear its silent howls as it passed by the few other buildings they noticed close by the cliff's edge, in front of the lighthouse.

As they were almost on the top of the hill, Luffy finally gave in to his desire to hurry and ran in full speed to take a closer look at the lighthouse. He stopped to stand right by it, a hand on the brick wall as he looked upwards.

"IT'S HUGE!" Luffy yelled as his eyes seemed to turn into stars. Robin chuckled as she reached his side and was able to take a good look at the lighthouse herself.

Luffy wasn't wrong - the lighthouse stood tall and Robin could see from the scratches and scrapes on the bricks and mortar that it had lived a long harsh life and would most likely not be falling down any time soon.

It was a magnificent sight, in its own right, and Robin couldn't help but to feel deep respect towards the old structure that must have already seen so much while standing high above these dangerous seas.

"Hey Robin; who do you think uses that light-thing on the top of it?" Luffy asked as he tried to see inside through a small glass-window that had been fitted deep within the old walls. Robin walked past him to check the door.

"I'd like to know that as well, it would be interesting to meet a person who has the responsibility over such a place."

The door was locked and Robin tried knocking on it.

"It's also possible that the light is automatic and the villagers only come over every now and then to see if it's still working properly, as well as to take care of the lighthouse itself. It's risky to have such an enormous structure built on the very top of a cliff like this, especially on an environment such as Grand Line."

Robin would've really liked to go and take a look inside the lighthouse but she didn't want to break in, at least not today. She decided to ask some of the villagers about how to get in - if she managed to find those of them who wouldn't mind helping her out.

Luffy nodded his head thoughtfully without paying much attention to what Robin had just said. He was already inspecting the two wooden stalls that formed a half circle in front of the lighthouse. They looked like small storages and didn't seem to be nearly as old as the lighthouse was. He tried to open one of them, but the doors were surprisingly tightly sealed even if there was no lock to be seen.

Luffy was starting to think there wasn't much more for him to see here, as he was also starting to get hungry which was making it harder for him to pay attention to anything else. He hadn't felt too hungry throughout the whole time they had sailed in the mist so he hadn't eaten as much as he usually would have - although his portions had still bigger than everyone else's combined.

But now, Luffy was getting eager to go and eat as much as he possibly could.

"Do you think the others have already left from Sunny?" Luffy asked as he turned to look at Robin who was also standing in the middle of the stalls and wondering what the meaning of them was -

There didn’t seem to be any.

"I suppose they might have even reached the town by now as I don't think it's that far away from here. It would make sense to build the town close by the lighthouse that guides ships towards it -", Robin said and then paused for a second, "- but from what we know about this island and its citizens, it could quite possibly be the other way around."

Robin then walked past the buildings and towards the edge of the cliff, also thinking about going to look for the town soon. She had a feeling there was a lot more to this island's history, as even the mist had made her very thoughtful with the way it had seemed to be wiped away the very moment they saw the flashing light of the lighthouse. It made her wonder about its true purpose.

Robin smiled at her thoughts - she rather enjoyed this type of mysteries to pass the time. It meant that there were more stories to be revealed, all with history of their own. And you never knew what you could find while meticulously going through every detail given.

 

* * *

 

Luffy looked up at the top of the lighthouse and grinned. He positioned himself and stretched his arms all the way to the top to get a good hold of the roof. He launched up and as carefully as possible landed on the roof. He made sure to hold on tightly, it wouldn't be good if the wind managed catch him off guard and throw him all the way down to the sea.

As Luffy looked around, he could see the town on the far left side of the island. It seemed to be a rather small one, having been built to follow the coastline all stretched out so that all of the houses had plenty of space between them. 

The villagers clearly were serious about wanting to be left alone.

Almost the whole island was covered in the dark leaved forests and fields - the simple island matched well the weather it was so well known for. Even now, when Luffy turned to look at the sea behind him he could see a wall of pure darkness being moved around by the strong winds. He found the image be both intriguing and terrifying, for some reason.

Luffy reached his hands down on the ground and then jumped, again as carefully as possible to not damage the lighthouse - he, too, felt respect towards the impressive structure.

Once Luffy landed, he turned towards the cliff where Robin was now standing and watching the sea, her silhouette looking elegant against the dark wall of mist covering the horizon.

Luffy wanted to tell Robin where the town was before heading there himself, to help her find it easily once she was done with the lighthouse -

With that in mind, he ran forward and called out to her.

Robin heard Luffy’s arrival and turned to look at him.

She was standing quite a few feet away from the edge, high above the sea level. The wind carried a few of Luffy's words to her and Robin heard him say something about the village.

She noticed that the wind was getting a bit stronger and she took a couple more steps away from the edge, just to be sure. Robin did trust her abilities to protect her but just like Luffy, she wasn’t going to be careless so close to the sea.

Had Robin seen what rose from the ground and lingered underneath her feet, she might have had some time to react to what was about to happen next. Luffy didn't see anything either, as he was still too far away and behind the rocks.

It was such a sudden change to the peaceful day that had just been their salvation.

Robin felt the light touch around her ankle and looked down. On the very moment she did, the darkness took her over.

There was nothing Robin could have done when her body was being pulled backwards and thrown over the edge.

And there was the darkness and _the hands_ that were reaching out, over the rocky walls, and catching hold of nothing.

"ROBIN!" Luffy yelled in shock as he saw Robin's eyes widen a split second before she was falling backwards, obviously too far away for him to reach in time.

It was all so sudden and Luffy didn't see any reason for this to happen - Robin flying through the air as he ran and stretched his arms out as fast as he could.

Robin's eyes closed and she was almost out of his field of vision just as Luffy's arms were about to reach the edge.

It wasn't enough.

Luffy didn't manage to get a hold of Robin, he was too late. And as he ran to the edge and stood there, looking down at the raging sea, he saw nothing but the rocks far below.

Luffy's movements stopped completely, not trying to reach his hands out when there was nothing for him to catch.

There had been no time for Robin to fall all the way down, Luffy would have seen her. He yelled again, calling her name desperately as he tried to understand _._ He told himself that he'd have to do something, either try to get down there or _get some help_ and fast.

But Luffy's body didn't move.

_'What just happened? What was it again? …Did... Did something happen..?'_

Luffy's mind was going blank as he stared down in the dark sea while the wind was pushing on his back with more force than before.

Slowly Luffy turned around, now facing the lighthouse. The wind got caught on his open vest and made him take an unsteady step backwards, towards the edge. He lifted his hands in front of his face - they were shaking.

It made no sense.

Luffy was starting to feel dizzy. All he wanted was to get some rest, and it made _no sense_. 

_'Why would I need to do that...?'_

Luffy's eyes widened as he looked over his shoulder and down at the sea. He could hear thunder somewhere far away and the waves were hitting the sharp rocks below him with all their might.

There was no doubt about it, a storm was coming -

And Robin had fallen down.

That's when Luffy finally started running as fast as he could. The wind was now screeching in his ears as he ran past the buildings, past the lighthouse, and straight back to the forest. He was stumbling as he wasn't able to feel his feet anymore and his vision was beginning to spin.

Luffy didn't understand what was happening but he knew that he couldn't get anything done on his own the way he was, he needed _help_. He needed to tell the rest of his crew what had happened.

They'd be able to help him - _help Robin_ \- just like they always were.

They’d be able to make sense to everything.

Luffy felt desperation as his feet were starting to give in.

Usually it wasn't like this.

_'Help Robin...! Help...?'_

Luffy knew he was going to faint any second now and there was absolutely nothing he could do about it. Incidentally, that was all he needed to know to force his body to move forward - he wouldn’t be able to get Robin back on his own which meant that he had to make it to the others in time.

Robin was gone, she had fallen down.

Luffy didn't know what happened, or where Robin had ended up at, but if he was going to fall unconscious then he'd have to tell the others what was going on before that could happen. Then the rest of the crew could go and get her back even without him.

It hadn't been long since they had brought down the whole of Enies Lobby just to save Robin so that she could finally live her life freely. She simply couldn't disappear like this. It couldn’t end like this.

Luffy, as Robin's captain, wouldn’t allow her to be taken away from them this easily. He took support from the trees surrounding him as he forced himself to hurry down the path without slowing down any more than he already had in his weakened state.

Luffy found himself thinking if it was Zoro's turn to watch the ship today as it usually was when everyone else left to do buy the groceries. Zoro was also injured so most likely Chopper had ordered him to stay on the ship.

There would also have to be someone watching over Zoro, because there was no way he would follow Chopper's orders otherwise.

_'Zoro and the others will know what to do…'_

Everything had fallen silent.

Nothing in the forest was moving anymore, only Luffy throwing himself forward and hoping that he was even going the right way. He was losing his trail of thought and wasn't sure why he was even running in the first place. He wanted to stop, stay in the forest underneath the leaves and be calmed by it once again.

Luffy wanted to rest in the forest where there were absolutely no animals, no insects or anything of the sorts… Just plants and trees and the darkness which was reaching out for him and making him want to stop and close his eyes.

But Luffy didn't give in.

He managed to make his way out of the forest, over the hill and then down the path that led straight to the coast with the Thousand Sunny waiting for him. Luffy fell over a few times on his way but managed to get up each time - he was glad he did as he finally saw the ship.

Luffy tried to call out to his crew but there was no sound leaving his throat and he didn't quite remember what he had wanted to say to them in the first place.

Luffy knew had to make it in time but why? What was he running away from?

_‘Why can’t I stop, just this once…’_

Luffy fell down again just as he reached the shore. He tried to force his body to move just a little longer, just a little further, but it was no use.

With the strength he had left, Luffy tried to drag himself forward. He looked up at Sunny, begging for help with eyes that didn't see quite far enough anymore.

Sunny was further away in the sea and Luffy already knew that there was no way he could make it all the way to the old dock connecting Sunny and the coast.

Luffy could feel his hands being scarred and even cut by the sharp sand that he was so desperately clinging on to. His feet had no feeling left and his body felt too heavy to move an inch. He had no strength left. He had never felt as tired before.

_'Let me rest…’_

Luffy sighed as he finally allowed himself to close his eyes.

Now he was able to clearly see the darkness that was reaching out for him, slowly managing to take complete hold of his thoughts and erase them, one by one. Luffy didn't have any other choice - he had to _sleep_ , to rest.

Luffy tried his hardest to understand why his mind was silently screaming at him to not give in to the _empty dreams_ that were taking him over.

But it was too late now as the darkness wiped Luffy's mind completely clear, and everything around him came to a halt.

 


	2. Gone for real

_"–n you hear me? Luffy?"_

_"What the hell happened to him, he just ran off a few min-“"-DOCTOR!!"_

_"THAT’S YOU!"_

_"Hey… Um... I-is he okay?"_

_"It seems so to me... I think he's just sleeping…"_

_"…what the hell?"_

 

* * *

 

Luffy slowly opened his eyes and looked around. He felt drowsy and couldn't see all that clearly, but what he did notice immediately was that his whole crew's eyes were on him.

"…w-what's going on?" Luffy asked sluggishly as Chopper hurried to see if he was alright, while everyone else remained quiet, being more than a little worried for their captain's health.

After all, Luffy had just moments ago run off excitedly while the rest of the crew had still been anchoring the ship - that way he had avoided helping with any of the chores they were just starting to share.

"That's exactly what we'd like to know!" Nami started yelling at Luffy the second Chopper whispered that he seemed to be perfectly fine, if only a bit tired.

"First you run off without listening to a thing I had to say and the next thing we know, Sanji sees you lying in the middle of the shore for seemingly no reason whatsoever. We were just about ready to leave to the village and we thought we'd find you there, as usual! Do you have any idea how worried we were when we saw you just lying here? We thought something had happened! And then we found out that you were _just sleeping_?

"Heck, you were filled with energy a second ago, how did you even manage to fall asleep?!"

Luffy stared up at Nami in confusion as he got into a sitting position. He tried his hardest to remember what exactly had happened after he left from Sunny, but found no memory - actually, even less than that.

Luffy shivered as the mere idea of _not remembering_ something made him feel like he had already lost.

Exactly what he had lost, Luffy didn't know, but it must have been something important -

The thought made him feel sick.

The more and more he racked his brain to remember, the harder the feeling of loss began to hit him. It was a feeling Monkey D. Luffy would soon become very _familiar_ with, and also something he would never get used to.

_‘Something is missing…'_

From what Nami had said, Luffy knew right away that something wasn’t right. He had suddenly fallen asleep in the sand and that wasn't normal.

Well, maybe for Ace it was, but that wasn’t the point.

Luffy slowly turned to look behind himself.

The sand was just like it should be, smooth and showing only the footprints of his worried crew having ran around him. For a second Luffy could have sworn that he had run to the beach from the direction of the forest, and not from the ship.

The more Luffy thought about it, the stronger the memory of _dragging_ himself forward became. He touched the sand carefully and on the back of his mind he remembered clinging on to it with all he had - the feeling of the sand digging painfully on to his palms was vivid.

But as Luffy looked at his hands he noted that they were perfectly clean, almost too much so - there was no way that memory could be real.

And still, no matter how many times Luffy tried to tell himself that, the feeling didn't let go. Even if he had no wounds on his palms, he could feel them sting. It made his head hurt.

Luffy was lost in his thoughts and completely forgot that his crew was standing right in front of him, still asking questions and starting to get more and more worried as Luffy's eyes seemed to cloud over.

But Luffy couldn't register anything they said as he used all of his strength to remember.

_'Where was I coming from...? Didn't something happen? Why do I remember something... like the wind?'_

Something was wrong, very wrong. 

Luffy had to dig even deeper into his memories.

Luffy couldn't hear his crew start calling his name, asking if he was all right as he really didn't look like he was. They were asking why he wasn't saying anything but when Luffy finally registered their voices, he had no answers to give anyway.

What could Luffy say, when he had no idea what was going on himself?

_'What is it, what do I have to remember…'_

Finally, Luffy's eyes widened slowly and he looked at the sea.

"Robin...?"

The whole crew heard the whisper and wondered if they had heard correctly.

"What about Robin?" Franky asked before anyone else had any time to react. Luffy turned to look at him, still trying to grasp the reason why thinking about Robin made him feel so helpless. He almost never felt like that, why would today be any different?

If only Luffy could remember.

_‘Behind the darkness... There was...'_

And suddenly he was able to see beyond the emptiness in his mind he had woken up with. It was all right there, and it hurt, but there was no time for him to dwell on it. Luffy jumped up and this time his feet didn’t give in.

"She fell down! Robin! From the cliff! I- I tried to reach out to her but she wasn't there anymore, she was gone! She disappeared!"

Everyone just stared at him - there was no reaction to Luffy's sudden outburst.

Luffy felt like they were all stuck, he himself included. He really wanted to run, and shake them or go help Robin but he just couldn't move and now he also remembered that now wasn’t the first time this had happened on the very same day.

Luffy could see Chopper shaking as he hid behind Usopp, clearly worried, but even the way he was moving began to seem completely wrong.

There was no other way to describe it, it was all just wrong.

_‘Wrong, wrong, WRONG!’_

Everything was _repeating_ itself, even the silence that surrounded them the same way it had in the forest. Only this time, Luffy didn’t feel like he was going to lose control of himself.

Luffy shook his head and it almost felt like a spell had been broken as everyone started talking again, whispering to each other and trying to make some sense to it by asking new questions.

Nami was the first to take hold of the situation. She walked up to Sanji and said something to him, Sanji nodding at her eagerly before he took off, hurrying towards the Thousand Sunny that was docked next to the island.

"Sanji will go see if Robin is still onboard the Sunny, since she’s not here", Nami said and carefully walked closer to Luffy.

They all knew Luffy, he wouldn't just come up with things like these and he would _never_ joke about his crew being in danger. And there had to be a good explanation for why they had found him from the shore in the first place.

"Luffy, could you slowly explain what happened - all of it?"

Luffy took a deep breath and closed his eyes. He had to calm down as his crew wouldn't understand him otherwise.

_‘Do I even understand myself?’_

If Luffy wanted to get help, he needed to let his crew to know everything about what had happened so that they could be careful when they went to get Robin back.

"After I left from Sunny, I saw Robin walking on towards the forest”, Luffy began as slowly as he could. ”I really wanted to go with her rather than go to the town. She said she wanted to see that lighthouse and I went there with her."

Luffy glanced at the cliff on far right of the island and everyone turned to see the tall lighthouse that had once helped them to make it this far. 

“But then I got bored and wanted to go to the village with you, so I went to tell Robin about it. She was standing near the edge of the cliff and she just… flew over."

_'She didn't fall down - it was like someone had thrown her over!'_

"I didn't see how it happened but it was almost like someone had attacked her! But I couldn't see who, and she didn't do anything to stop herself from falling! I tried to reach for her, so I ran towards the edge but- She wasn’t there anymore… And I didn’t see her fall all the way down - I should have if she had fallen over the edge in the first place!"

Luffy took another deep breath before continuing:

"That's when I ran back here. It almost felt like someone was forcing me to fall asleep, I don't know. It just… I know it doesn't make any sense, but that’s what happened!"

Luffy had a serious expression on his face as he looked at every single member of his crew, one at a time.

"I know what I saw and we have to get Robin back!"

The Straw Hats could see in Luffy’s eyes how much he wanted to run off right now - they knew he wasn’t lying. His explanation was lacking but from what they had heard it was clear that Luffy himself didn't know much more and this was better than what they normally got out of him, anyway. 

Just then they heard Sanji running on the deck and they all turned to face him as he landed back on the shore. They could hear him yell that Robin hadn’t been onboard.

The crew looked at each other and they all tried to come up with a conclusion that would solve everything.

"You know, m-maybe Robin just left a while back, just like Luffy said. She always does that so there's no need to worry about her just yet, right?" Usopp said and Luffy couldn't help but to glare at him.

"What are you talking about!? Did you even listen to _what I just said_! We need to hurry and help her!" Luffy was yelling now; he didn't understand what the problem was, he was the captain and it was Robin they were talking about - they should just go and help her, without questioning it.

But the crew did listen and they did understand, just a bit too well. They knew he wasn’t lying but they had a good reason to think that what Luffy had told them wasn't real.

Brook carefully opened his mouth to point out just what they were all thinking about.

"We do believe you! But there was simply... not enough time for all this to happen."

The others nodded and Luffy's expression went blank.

"It hasn't even been as long as ten minutes since you left from Sunny. There's just no time to reach that lighthouse and come back, never the less for everything else you mentioned to happen. And then there’s this whole conversation we’ve just had, it all just couldn’t have possibly taken place in that small amount of time. That's why we were so worried about you in the first place, how you seemed to have fallen down the moment you jumped over to the shore", Nami said, falling quiet after she finished the point Brook was making.

Nami looked up at the lighthouse and calculated the time and speed needed to reach there and back - and, just to be certain, she repeated that same calculation again and again, no matter how useless it was.

Luffy couldn’t believe what he had just been told. "O-only ten minutes? But…", he mumbled, even more confused than before.

_'There's no time, no time…’_

"This is the Grand Line, when has anything ever made any sense? And that shouldn't even matter, we are supposed to follow our captains lead, made it any sense or not", Zoro said and everyone fell quiet in shock as they turned to look at him. He seemed annoyed and dead serious, which made the whole crew realize that if the wounds he got in Thriller Bark had healed enough, he most likely would have followed Luffy a long while back.

All they had to do was to search for Robin, there was nothing to be lost there.

The moment Luffy heard what Zoro said, he gathered himself and his strength, turning around and taking off. He couldn't hear what the others had to say as they yelled after him, but he didn't have to.

Zoro had made Luffy realize another thing that he had somehow managed to forget:

_'They will follow me, there's no doubt about that!'_

Zoro had been right, Luffy knew what he saw and even if it turned out not having been real, he had to be sure of that first - all that mattered was finding Robin.

They couldn't just wait for her to come back because there hadn't been any time for her to get lost in the first place!

Even if Luffy ended up being wrong about what had happened, he could never forgive himself if Robin was lost forever just because he didn't even try to do anything to help her.

And that's how a messed up situation was put into words that made more sense to Luffy than anything else ever had.

_‘No more time to lose!’_

All Luffy had to do was to trust his senses, and those were telling him to go back to the cliff. 

Luffy ran through the forest once again and kept his focus on the lighthouse. He had to reach it as quickly as possible, he had already fasted far too long doing what exactly, sleeping? Doubting everything?

As Luffy ran past the trees, he briefly noted that this time around he wasn't tired, it felt like he was getting more and more energy the closer to the lighthouse he got - almost as if the building itself was pulling him forward. 

Luffy glanced behind him as another of his earlier thoughts resurfaced. 

_'They will follow me…'_

As Luffy then looked back up at the lighthouse, deep down he thought that he had just made a big mistake.

But even then, he couldn’t help but to ignore the thought and decide that getting the rest of his crew to join him had been the right thing to do.

It all began to feel so right and real.

 


	3. and Again

_Here he was again, standing in the middle of the three wooden stalls and the lighthouse, wondering why the sea was calling for him like this._

_He had been cursed all those years ago, but never did the sea so eagerly crave for his life._

_Or maybe it wasn't the sea, maybe it was something completely different. He knew there was something right behind him, whispering to him, and he couldn't turn around and see what it was -_

_He knew it could never be that easy to reveal the entity's true form._

_What bothered him the most was how often he seemed to lose control of his own mind on this island - whatever it was that stood behind him seemed to always be more than one step ahead._

_All this made him doubt his own strength more and more._

_Why couldn’t he fight it?_

 

* * *

 

The wind calmed down and the horizon had cleared, which made it seem like the same calm and peaceful day it had been the last time Luffy had been up here. While it felt so long ago, he could never forget the way the wind had pushed on to his back as if it had been alive, making it impossible for the place to have the same effect on him as it once had.

All Luffy cared about this time was being more careful, and getting Robin back.

With every step, Luffy studied carefully his surroundings and held tightly to the rocks around him. While inching towards the edge, he could hear Nami's voice calling behind him, her voice having no trouble to reach all the way from the lighthouse to the edge -

Luffy could clearly hear the slight panic it held.

_'What if they think I'm going to jump after Robin, to find her?'_

"Luffy, stop! It's not safe to run off on you own after everything you told us!"

Luffy looked behind him, careful not to let go of the rocks, and saw not just Nami but also Usopp and Franky running towards him. They were all carrying quite a lot of supplies on their backs.

Usopp stopped right after passing the stalls, breathing heavily after having to run up in record speed. He looked rather impressed as he turned to glance up at the lighthouse, the building in ragged condition but still a magnificent sight even up close.

"I can see why Robin would like this place", Franky said as he was now slowly walking towards Luffy, also looking around and getting to know the environment. "Luckily we have just the way to safely check out that cliff."

Usopp hurried to help Franky with whatever they were planning to build and Luffy didn't say anything. He turned his attention back to the edge and stretched his neck to look over it.

It was just like it had been before, waves crashing on the rocks below and with no sign of Robin to be seen.

Luffy turned to look at the rest of his crew again, watching them work. Nami stood a safe distance away, among the bigger rocks, and looked at the sea. Her voice was no longer louder than a whisper as she spoke.

"We are high above the sea level… Falling down all the way from here would be horrifying." The wind gently wiped her hair forward and made her shiver. The sight made Luffy worry even more for the safety of his crew.

_'What can we trust?'_

"Watch out for the wind, there's something wrong with it", Luffy said, and even he knew how odd he must have sounded. Still, no-one said anything and seemingly took in his warning as they steadied their footing.

Everything was moving too slowly in Luffy's eyes, but Franky and Usopp were working on some sort of a rack as fast as they could.

"Do you believe me?"

It was a question Luffy had to ask from the silence taking over. He knew his crew would do anything they could to help, but it hurt to be the only one who had seen what had happened and thus believe in it.

Especially it hurt Luffy now that the feeling of threat, and the pure wrongness of the whole situation, was beginning to make him doubt himself all over again -

No matter how many times Luffy managed to straighten out his thoughts, the same things seemed to keep coming back.

_'What if -"_

"Luffy… In the very least, we know there's something off with this place and we need to find out what. But before that, we need to get Robin back", Nami said, unable to outright answer his question.

Franky and Usopp were in the middle of their work, but still able to share a few looks as they listened to the conversation.

They clearly agreed with what Nami had said, Luffy noted.

_‘That's good enough'_

"Is that what the others are doing as well, searching for Robin?"

Nami nodded and quickly began explaining. "Sanji went to look around the village and ask the people there as much about this place as they're willing to share with strangers. I also asked him to check the rest of the island - luckily for us, it's not that large. Chopper and Brook on the other hand are doing the same thing somewhere around the coastline while keeping an eye on Zoro. Once they're done, they'll meet us here. And, if Robin doesn't show up before then, um... We'll just have to figure out what to do next together."

Luffy was impressed at the speed they had come up with a plan of action; while it wasn't much, it was still plenty compared to him being as useless as he had been, running off. Of course, the crew had gotten used to all sorts of situations along their journey, and Luffy couldn't help but to think that rarely had he been much of a use for them on planning things out anyway.

Luffy was almost always the one to get them into trouble in the first place.

"All right, we're all done here. Good thing we had all these supplies ready to be used", Franky said rather proudly. Luffy and Nami turned to look at what they had built and saw a wooden platform with professionally built supporting structures and robes.

"With this, you'll be able to lower down and check if there's a place for Robin to be at", Usopp said to Luffy, also proud of what they had made in such a small amount of time. "Franky and I will stay here and make sure nothing goes wrong while you go down."

"We're not letting Luffy go there on his own, one of you has to go with him", Nami said and crossed her arms over her chest, as she wasn't going to be the one going.

"W-well then, Franky can -"

"Sorry now, Long Nose, I have to keep this thing working. It's up to you", Franky said and moved the platform to the edge, ready to lower it. The moment the platform was on its place, Luffy jumped on it.

"Come on, Usopp! There's no time for this!"

There was nothing else Usopp could have done, he only yelped as Luffy took a hold of him and placed him on the platform next to him. Franky took a few torches from the bag he had carried most of the supplies in and then threw them to Luffy and Usopp, the latter almost dropping his to the sea below due to his shaking hands.

"These robes aren't nearly long enough to take you all the way down, but it should be enough to see what's going on. Pull this string once when you want to stop and twice to be pulled up, it'll ring a bell."

"Take care Straw Hat, Long Nose", Franky finished as he started to slowly lower the platform. Luffy nodded and got ready to look around while Usopp simply wrapped himself around the supports, closed his eyes and then whispering to himself:

"I helped build this thing, it's save for sure… No worries, no worries, _nothing to be afraid of_. I'm not going to get sick, I'm strong…"

_'I'm not falling down... No one is, not this time'_

Luffy looked up at Nami and Franky as they slowly disappeared behind the edge.

"Be careful!" Nami yelled after them as she waved.

"Yeah, you too! Watch out for the edge...!" Luffy replied.

 

* * *

 

The platform was well built, making it sturdy and unaffected by the wind that was getting even stronger the further down they got as there was nothing covering them from it.

The sound of waves crashing far below made both Usopp and Luffy feel uneasy.

_'Craving for my life'_

"Lu- Luffy, look! There's a lair!" Usopp pointed at the wall. Hidden behind the rocks was a small ledge and what seemed to be an opening to a cave. They weren't that far down just yet which made Luffy want to believe that this is the place where Robin had ended up at.

It was well hidden when looking down from above.

"Franky, we found a cave!" Luffy yelled and Usopp quickly pulled the string once which made the platform stop almost immediately.

"Let's go, Usopp!"

Luffy moved, as carefully as possible, from the platform to the ledge and then pulled Usopp over as well, and straight in to the cave. With the lights Franky had given them, they began to investigate the space.

Usopp knocked on the walls of the cave, both him and Luffy briefly wondering just how strong they must be since they were able to hold not just the lighthouse but also the whole cliff above them without collapsing.

Thinking about the walls giving in wasn't very reassuring, Usopp noticed, and he chose to open his mouth instead of dwelling on his thoughts.

"If Robin really fell, she could have easily used her powers to reach this place", Usopp said, following right after Luffy and trying to keep an eye out for everything there was surrounding them while marking their path with a piece of chalk.

Luffy knew that Usopp didn't like places like this that much, but neither did he - at least not this time.

_'She didn't fall…'_

"She would have found a way up already, then…" Luffy said quietly. He was still shocked by his own negativity and the way his words didn't sound like his own. He only managed to make Usopp more and more nervous and that was bad.

Luffy had to fix this, all of this.

"Or maybe she thought she'd find a way up, or something else down here instead, and decided to look around. If she's here, we'll find her!" Luffy said and turned to look at Usopp with a wide yet fake smile on his face, realizing that he hadn't smiled properly for days now.

First it had been because of the mist -

Usopp had been taking support of the cold rock walls as he drew the guiding line on them, but now the line suddenly ended right behind Luffy, the abandoned chalk rolling on the floor.

Luffy's smile faltered.

Usopp was nowhere to be seen.

"USOPP!"

_'There's no way he could have just - there was no sound, nothing!'_

Luffy started running, swinging his torch from one direction to the other as he was trying to find something; any reason for Usopp to be gone.

He saw a dim light from behind one corner, illuminating on the smooth stone walls, and Luffy hurried to it, calling Usopp's name again and again.

No answer was to be heard.

When Luffy made it behind the corner there was nothing but the darkness and its thin fingers lingering in the air as if pulling something within. The light of the torch that was lying on the ground was unable to properly penetrate the misty nothingness now surrounding it, and so it first flickered and then burned out completely, the torch too disappearing in the shadows.

Luffy stopped, not for the first time and certainly not for the last, but now he didn't petrify for as long as before.

Luffy threw his own torch in the darkness, near the spot where the other one had just been at, and watched as it managed to light the space surrounding it briefly before going out as well.

But there had been nothing there for Luffy to see within it, other than a dead end.

_'Usopp… T-the walls took Usopp?!'_

And now Luffy was getting angry and for the first time since arriving on this island he felt like no-one could stop him as he pulled back his fists.

"GATLING GUN!"

_'I'll get you back!'_

Luffy hit the wall again and again with full force -

This attack had been able to take down so many enemies that Luffy had no doubt it would be able to break through a few layers of rock. The sound of his yells and his punches echoed through the cave, most likely even reaching the ears of Franky and Nami high above him, but it was no use.

The wall didn't break, not even one rock was destroyed. All Luffy had managed to do was to make his own hands bleed - again.

Luffy could sense something mocking him from within the walls around him, but his anger smothered the feeling quickly.

He stopped his attack and slowly walked towards the wall he had been so desperate to break. Luffy was swaying from side to side - of course he was, nothing new to that.

Luffy touched the wall gently, pressing his fingers against its cold surface, and then turned around.

_'How many times does this have to happen?'_

Luffy picked up his torch and walked forward, the torch relighting after a moment. He found himself thinking about getting back in the sunlight they had missed so much only a day before.

He knew the feeling that was rising from inside him far too well, Luffy knew he was going to faint again soon. But this time he didn't feel like hurrying to the others. He didn't feel like he could do anything anymore.

Luffy closed his eyes, leaning against the wall as he walked forward ever so slowly, dragging his feet as he moved. His mind was going blank and he didn’t try to change that. Not until he heard them.

"FRANKY!"

Luffy's eyes shot open as he heard Franky yell, Nami screaming his name. He started running again. He didn't know how he could have forgotten that the rest of his crew was still up there, still in danger.

_'What's wrong with me, I-I'm not like this!'_

The opening of the cave was now right in front of Luffy, it seemed like he hadn't been that far away from it in the first place. He hurried outside and the first thing he saw was that the platform wasn't there anymore.

Luffy called for his crew as loudly as he could, but there were no sounds coming from above him anymore.

Luffy dropped the torch on the ground and stretched his arms upwards, reached them as far up as he could and then taking a hold on the rocks, preparing to launch himself.

But the moment Luffy jumped, it was almost as if something had taken a hold of his hands and forced him to let go of the wall, causing him to lose his footing as he was now falling uncontrollably through the air and his hat's string was almost painfully pulling against his neck.

Luffy tried to reach out again and take a hold of the ledge or the walls, or anything there was - nothing worked, as everything he managed to reach seemed to escape from underneath his fingers the moment he touched it.

The wind was picking up and suddenly threw Luffy further and further away from the island with such a force that his hands were unable to no longer even reach anywhere near it again, in his current state.

It almost felt like the land itself was trying to get away from Luffy, forcing him to fall.

_'I- I’m falling to the sea'_

Luffy was beginning to panic, everything that had happened and every emotion he had felt previously returning at once. He yelled and reached out over and over again with everything he had, but every time he thought he had managed to take hold of something that didn't give in, his bleeding hands did exactly that.

Luffy had no strength left and he was starting to get numb again.

It was just like after Robin had disappeared and he had started to lose himself. Luffy knew what would be coming next. He closed his eyes as tightly as he could but this time imagining the emptiness himself and not waiting for it to come for him first.

If it was the only thing that could happen next, then Luffy wanted to at least try to be the one taking control over it first.

The sea was calling underneath and this time, regardless of the fear it set within him, Luffy couldn't help but to force himself to smile. He had briefly thought about falling, back on the edge, and that's exactly what he was doing right now.

_'I can't fight it'_

Robin had fallen, Usopp had been taken by the walls, he knew Franky and Nami were gone as well, and there was no doubt in Luffy's mind that the exact same thing had already managed to take them all, _long before_ they had even reached the island.

The fall was longer than Luffy had expected, but he didn't want to look to see how much of it was still left. The wind screeching in his ears had been the only sound he had heard all the way down, but now even it was being muffled by the darkness.

It was becoming so quiet again, not even the waves making a sound.

Peaceful, that's what it was, more calming than anything else.

Luffy's mind was closing off completely and _the one_ in the darkness had a pleased smile on their face when greeting him in.

Luffy chose to ignore all this, instead his last thought being on the sea below and in the realization of what it truly meant for him. 

 


	4. Lost in the sea

_This wasn't what he had wanted, but it had happened and here he was: once again within the darkness._

_What had happened, was it the same as betrayal? He had left everyone behind and hadn't even wished to get back to those who had been taken before him._

_In the end, all he had hoped for had been silence and a chance to rest._

_But even that he was now unable to get as someone else's hands took a hold of his own, finding him in return._

'… _I never hit water'_

 

* * *

 

Luffy's thoughts were clearing again and he panicked, flailing with his arms. With his eyes wide open he looked around and saw blurry lines that were quickly forming into familiar faces, all of them looking just as shocked as he was feeling.

"We are going to flip over!" Chopper screamed and held on to the sides of the mini-Merry that was rapidly swaying from side to side. Zoro had taken a firm hold of Luffy and stopped him from moving around while he was till regaining his senses.

Once Luffy realized who were surrounding him, he relaxed as much as he could, the boat's rapid movements coming to halt with him. 

The mini-Merry was full with Luffy, Zoro, Chopper and Brook all onboard. The three asked in worry why he had suddenly fallen from the cliff and if he was alright, and Luffy heard Chopper say that Brook had been the one noticing him in the air and then jumping on the rocks, catching him as he fell.

Luffy could see Zoro hold his own side when he carefully sat down on the other side of the boat. He was still wounded from the fight in Thriller Bark, after all.

Everyone acted just like they should have, but Luffy couldn't help but stare right past them. He had almost died. 

"What are you doing here?" Luffy asked, not giving the others any answers to their own questions first.

There was no way they could be down here just to save him, Luffy thought to himself, they weren't supposed to be there to catch him.

The crew fell silent, sharing looks. Chopper looked scared, Zoro annoyed and Brook… who knows.

' _Right… I'm the one acting strange here…'_

While Luffy came to this realization he also noticed that he didn't really care.

For the first time on this day, Luffy's head felt oddly clear. He finally understood that he didn't sound like himself at all and he also knew that his thoughts weren't something he could ever recognize as his own - he was not in control.

_'I'm what's wrong here'_

"W-well, after you ran off, Nami told us to look around the island and then gather up in front of the lighthouse. You said that you saw Robin fall down from there so we decided to have a look down here... And, technically speaking, w-we are now in front of the lighthouse as well..." Chopper said and pointed up at the edge.

Luffy followed the doctor's gaze, seeing the top of the lighthouse greet them above.

It felt like forever ago since Luffy had been up there and Robin had walked closer to the edge. If only that hadn't happened.

"Did you see anything when I fell?"

"We saw you when you were already halfway down, without Brook's speed we would have never reached you in time", Zoro said gruffly, and also looked up at the cliff. "But no, we didn't see anything else. Other than you not making a move to stop yourself from coming down."

_'I was flailing most of the way down... Wasn't I?'_

Zoro sounded angry, of course he did. He wanted to know what was going on and where the rest of the crew was, but Luffy wasn't giving him anything.

Not that Zoro could have been much help anyway, as the were all painfully aware with him currently unable to even move properly.

"You were asleep again, but for a moment I thought you were d-dead", Chopper whispered, more than a little worried for Luffy's health. Brook on the other hand stayed completely silent and steered their ship down the coastline, further away from the rocks and dangerous currents -

This was the Grand Line after all, it wasn't safe to stay on open waters for too long with three Devil Fruit users and one injured swordsman onboard.

Luffy closed his hands in fists and looked down at the deep, calm sea.

"Usopp's gone. I don't know what happened to Nami and Franky, but I think they are too".

Chopper squeaked but other than that there was no sound. Brook kept steering and they were now closing the coast beyond the rocky cliff. There they could get back on land and climb up to the lighthouse and see for themselves what had happened.

Luffy wasn't going to stop them - he knew that there was no way for him to do so.

No-one was hurrying, time was once again slowing down around them.

_'I won't let anything take them, not this time'_

They reached the shore and jumped on land still without words. Luffy was watching his crew's every move, not willing to let them be out of his sight for a moment.

Whatever was after them, Luffy would catch and then he would get the rest of them back.

That is what Luffy was telling himself again and again while trying to overthrow the emptiness within him - he wanted to fix himself, he wanted to overthrow the _wrongness_ strangling his lungs. He was trying to force himself back to the way he was supposed to be, but he was unable to say a word to the rest of his crew as he watched everything unfold.

_'The rest of them… Everything that's left'_

"The ones who disappeared were Robin, Franky, Nami and Usopp, right? Then that shitty cook should still be out there", Zoro said as if he had known exactly what Luffy had just though. He was good at that, which managed to make Luffy feel somewhat better.

Some things were still the same, and Sanji possibly being safe and able to help them was also giving Luffy  _hope_.

Luffy wanted to believe in hope.

Brook attached mini-Merry to the close by tree, just to be safe, and then all four of them hurried towards the forest that seemed a lot different than the spot where Luffy had entered through before: the forest here was incredibly thick.

They weren't that far away from the Thousand Sunny on the beach on their right, which made it odd how much the scenery could have changed.

Luffy stayed a little behind the rest as they ran, just so he could keep an eye on them. He heard Chopper ask if Zoro was alright and if he wanted to stay behind -like hell he would, even Luffy wouldn't let him do that now no matter what - and then he heard the sound of waves smashing against the shore.

No-one else seemed to react to the sound, but Luffy glanced over his shoulder only to see nothing there -

Not even Merry.

_'One more gone, gone…'_

All Luffy could do was take a shallow breath and then put his full attention back to his crew before him. They didn't need to know of this, not yet. If they were to find the rest of them, they could possibly find mini-Merry as well.

But that didn't mean it didn't hurt Luffy to lose sight of yet another one of his crew members, especially one that he had already lost once not long before.

Luffy forced himself to drop those thoughts. He had to focus on the task at hand, he couldn't afford to lose his head anymore.

But just as soon as that thought passed through his mind, following every move of his crew proved futile:

With no warning, only for a mere fragment of a second Chopper disappeared behind a tree he was passing from the wrong side of Luffy's view. It took less than a second, for him to not come visible again from the other side.

The sound of Chopper's steps were silenced almost as if they had never been there in the first place.

Luffy's eyes turned fully to the spot where Chopper was meant to be and that was his next mistake.

Luffy swallowed, the darkness flashing at the corner of his eye, and he turned to look back at Zoro and Brook still hurrying ahead, to tell them to stop. But, he could only see Brook ahead of him, only hear the skeleton's steps echo in the woods.

Zoro and Chopper had both been swept away in the blink of an eye.

Luffy's voice got stuck in his throat as he fully understood there was nothing he could do for them now. He wasn't going to accept it, _no_ , but he had to keep going.

The sound of his own footsteps against the dry ground joined Brook's when he ran after the skeleton: Luffy didn't know what to say to the musician when he was to notice the other two no longer following along with them.

But for now Luffy could only run and try his hardest to fix it all.

After losing the reassurance of being close to the others, and the belief he had a chance to protect them this way, Luffy noticed how the island was working hard to drain him of all emotion.

Or maybe that had already been done by the mist.

But Luffy wouldn't allow Brook to disappear without a fight, and Luffy willed himself to believe that the others, the crew he cared about more than anything else, were  _still there,_ somewhere on this island.

Because they _were_ , they had to be - Luffy would reach the lighthouse and find them.

They must already be waiting for Luffy to get to them.

_'And I will get them back, all of them, and we will continue our journey... Forget all about this…!'_

Brook reached the opening first and slowed down in his steps. He looked up the hill and at the lighthouse in awe before turning around.

The skeleton seemed to frown as he took a few confused steps back towards his captain, once he saw him to be the only one following behind.

"What happe-"

"They're gone. Just keep going forward, Brook!"

Luffy's eyes looked straight up at him and Brook didn't question his captain's words.

Brook didn't want to go through this, once more losing a crew, but there was nothing else for him to do but to follow orders - to not be left behind.

The two of them ran again, up the hill and closer to the lighthouse.

Luffy strained his ears to hear anything that could give him a hint of what to do next, maybe even the calls of his crew. But instead...

It was immediate.

Luffy was falling forward, his body giving in so suddenly that he didn't have the slightest chance to react.

Luffy could only watch as Brook kept running, again not noticing what happened as he left his captain behind.

Luffy groaned, everything darkening again and giving him no time to think twice about it.

Before everything went black he could see something raise from the ground and reach out for Brook, but all that Luffy's mind chose to ignore.

Truthfully speaking, Luffy was starting to get used to it.

 

* * *

 

Luffy was woken up by Sanji shaking him by the shoulders and yelling at him.

Luffy opened his eyes and stared blankly at the cook who was angry and confused, not having found any other members of the crew anywhere. Luffy registered him asking what the hell was going on and gave the only answer he could think of, still:

"I don't know…"

A moment of silence, Sanji letting go of Luffy's arm with his shaking hands.

"Have you seen Brook?" Luffy had to ask, although he knew there was no way the skeleton was anywhere to be found anymore.

Sanji got back to his feet, fuming.

"No. You mean to tell me everyone else has disappeared, too?! Not just Robin, but everyone? Even Nami!?"

Sanji didn't want to believe that could ever be the case, but the way Luffy looked now was telling him it was the only possibility.

Luffy simply nodded, Sanji closing his eyes in disbelief and confused despair.

They were right next to the lighthouse, Luffy realized as he got up to his own swaying feet. "What are you doing here?", he asked Sanji with a quiet voice.

"Franky told me to come here after going to the village, but I couldn't find anyone. Until I saw you, that is", Sanji said, his voice hollow. 

The two of them, they were the last ones left.

"Was there anyone in the village?"

"No..."

_'That's it, then'_

Luffy gave Sanji a brief version of everything that had happened after they first went their separate ways, only leaving out the details of his growing lack of faith and the _darkness_.

Sanji accepted Luffy's words without questioning anything.

"All the biggest bullshit that could ever happen in this world always happens to us, huh…"

Luffy didn't take his eyes off of the chef, even blinking his eyes felt dangerous. He was certain now that even that would be long enough to allow Sanji to disappear.

Sanji was the last one left, the last one to whom Luffy could tell his story and who could try to solve it with him.

_'There really isn't anyone else on this island but us...'_

"It all started with the lighthouse, right? Should we just tear it all down..."

Luffy's eyes widened at Sanji's empty words, as if the idea had never even crossed his mind. _Tearing it down_ hadn't worked when Usopp had been taken, but now there were two of them to try -

Maybe it would work.

And it's not like Luffy had any ideas of his own.

"Yes."

Sanji looked at Luffy in surprise, not having expected him to take the suggestion as anything serious.

"Let's bring it all down."

Sanji nodded, weak on his feet as he turned to face the lighthouse.

Together they went to the door and it didn't take much worse for Sanji to kick it down first. They went in and saw the empty room, hurried up the stairs and found nothing but dust that was illuminated by sunlight through the dirty glass windows.

Luffy was starting to feel anger boil inside of him, and broke one of the windows with his fist. Sanji didn't say anything, looking at the completely opposite direction in silence.

They walked down the stairs and through the wide open door, Luffy right behind Sanji as they got back to the sunlight, preparing to destroy the building as their next move with nothing else to work with.

Everything was moving so slow, Sanji cursing under his breath yet Luffy being unable to hear anything he said -

Until Sanji said something that made Luffy halt.

"This has to be a dream…"

Those simple words, Luffy found himself thinking that they made perfect sense to him.

"And once I wake up, everyone will be back…" Luffy whispered and began to smile. Sanji turned to look at him, his unsteady frown deepening as he lit a cigarette and glanced around.

"It's never that easy, you know…"

They looked at each other, Luffy's smile not faltering and Sanji taking a careful step backwards.

Another silent moment, the clouds moving in the sky in a steady flow.

Sanji filled his lungs with the smoke and seemed to make up his mind, walking back towards the lighthouse and right past Luffy who didn't take his eyes off of him.

Sanji reached the doorframe and stood under it, deep in thought. "We need to think this through before bre-"

Luffy's smile faltered as the darkness from within the dusty shadows of the lighthouse pressed forward, clutching itself around Sanji's arms. The cigarette fell from the cook's mouth and he pulled in a sharp breath as his consciousness was wiped clear.

_'Just like what happened to Robin'_

Luffy's thoughts were running wild, leaving him unable to do anything more.

The _hands_ of the darkness pulled Sanji inside of the lighthouse, and the door slammed shut behind him.

Luffy didn't lift a finger - he could only stare as the last member of his crew was taken from him.

This time he hadn't taken his gaze off of Sanji, not for a second, but he had still been taken. Now Luffy had truly witnessed it with his own eyes.

Whoever was behind this could very well be a Devil Fruit user, Luffy knew that was always a possibility, but he wanted to believe in another answer. And he was almost certain that his new theory could work even against a Devil Fruit's powers.

_'Nothing makes any sense!'_

Luffy closed his eyes and clutched his head. "A dream; all I have to do is wake up…"

_'But even if it's not one, I'll find them.'_

When Luffy reopened his eyes, he couldn't see anything but the darkness holding its palms across his face.

He could still feel the gravel and grass underneath his shoes, and the same breeze on his face. And now Luffy knew what he had to do next.

For once Luffy was certain - he had to use his mind.

Luffy swung around and ran, trusting his feet to carry him even if he was unable to see where he was going. He reached the rocks close to the cliff and jumped right over them.

_'I have to break it'_

This time around, Luffy fell from the cliff's edge without being forced to do so by anything or anyone.

As he fell, Luffy could hear the wind howling past his ears, not trying to fight the fall as he knew that he wasn't going to die. The sea below didn't mean anything, anymore - as a force he couldn't see.

They were all going to make it out of this, and as the captain of the Straw Hats, Luffy was going to make sure of that.

 


	5. at that Place

_It felt like waking up from a long and exhausting nightmare._

_He listened to the creaking and quickly recognized it, knowing he was on board of his ship, his home. He let out a sigh of relief, feeling the loss of fatigue from his mental struggles take over, and sat up on his bed._

_No matter how tired he was, there was no way he'd be able to fall asleep right after what he had just witnessed. He opened his eyes and tried to adjust to the fabricated darkness of the men's bedroom, while his ears strained to hear the breathing and snoring that usually filled the space._

_Although he could hear the sounds of the ship, he couldn't hear any life within it._

 

* * *

 

Luffy stumbled around the messy room and reached desperately for any of his sleeping crew that should have been there with him. He tried to keep his breathing calm while telling himself that his mind was just messing with him after living through the nightmare it had. His crew would be right there and they would get annoyed with him fumbling around and waking them up in the dead of the night.

But Luffy's hands wiped through the beds without reaching any of his friends.

_'No, no, no...!'_

"Zoro?! Usopp, Chopper, Sanji!" Luffy yelled out and hurried towards the door. "Franky! Brook!"

Luffy ran out on the deck and through the thick mist that had overtaken it once again. He reached the women's quarters and rushed straight in:

"Nami, Robin!"

Luffy stopped in the middle of the empty room and felt like he was suffocating.

"A-anyone? It was just a nightmare!"

Believing everyone would be back and now feeling the losses again as fresh cuts at his flesh, made it all feel even worse than it had before. Luffy clenched his fists and stared at the floor with no real thoughts running through his mind, only denial trying to rebuild his reality anew.

Luffy had no idea how long he stood there.

It could have been either hours or days later that Luffy finally noticed a harsh line of light ever so slowly break past the curtained window and slice through the room, moving the shadows around him. The line disappeared and reappeared again in a steady rhythm, wiping over his feet and reflecting slightly off the floorboards.

Luffy looked up and slowly dragged his feet towards the window. He pulled the curtains apart and _through the mist_ he could make out the outlines of the lighthouse, its piercingly bright light breaking through the dark as it turned around and around, reaching towards him.

Jumping from the cliff hadn't taken Luffy too far.

_'If the lighthouse is still there and I'm on board of the Sunny... Then… This must be the dock'_

Abruptly Luffy turned and ran outside.

_'This is where it began'_

Stopping at the side of the ship and looking down over the railing, Luffy couldn't quite make out if there was anything there; neither the deck or the sea. He remembered what had happened to the mini-Merry and wondered if both he and the Sunny had been swallowed whole by whatever it was that _controlled_ the darkness.

The lighthouse was at the center of it all, of that Luffy was still certain.

Luffy reached his arm down the side of the ship to feel what was underneath. He wasn't going to blindly jump down again, not for now at least, but based on his experience on the cliff he was prepared to try it again. At least it had given him a new scenario to work with, a new solution to look for.

_'There has to be a way out'_

Luffy's hand finally reached the freezing water below and even the slightest touch managed to make him dizzy. He pulled his arm back and stumbled a little before regaining his balance.

He glanced at the only actual light source still flashing calmly through the mist as if mocking him, creating even more shadows on the terrain already difficult enough to make out as it was. Everything was painted in gray and Luffy felt a headache starting to form within his skull. He gritted his teeth before yelling out, overtaken by anger:

"I don't know what you want from me, but you should give me my crew back before I RIP YOU APART!"

Although Luffy wasn't expecting an answer, he hoped that whatever force was holding this _dream world_ together would still be listening and aware that he was serious. 

The silence was getting on his nerves, working to create his next course of action. A dream couldn't possibly last forever. And even if this reality was actually created by someone, they must get just as bored as Luffy did if he decided to do nothing at all with what he was given.

_'...The next move will be yours'_

Luffy sat down on the swing and closed his eyes - they weren't much use in the mist anyway. Instead, he used all of his other senses to paint a picture of his surroundings. He didn't know how long he would be doing this for, in this realm where it felt like time didn't exist at all.

All Luffy knew was that he didn't grow hungry nor tired as the time passed.

 

* * *

 

The sea was moving calmly around the ship and, while being swayed by it, Sunny made ever so small creaks Luffy was usually incredibly fond of but which now seemed completely unfamiliar to him. Calm wind rustled through the grass underneath his feet and he could feel the moisture of the mist on his skin and lungs.

Luffy felt like he was the only person existing on this invisible sea, sailing on a ghost ship that wasn't quite the Thousand Sunny he knew. Even without the rest of the crew there, the ship was too lifeless to be his, as if its soul hadn't been brought all the way here with him.

Through his eyelids, Luffy followed the steady flashing of the light. He thought through the alternatives for the reason behind this dreamlike state, trying to pick the one that would give him the most consolidation.

It didn't work out too well:

 _'Maybe I didn't wake up after the fight at Thriller Bark, m_ _aybe something there put me in a... coma?'_

_'Maybe my crew is right next to me, trying to wake me up'_

_'Maybe they are in a place similar to this, facing their own fears and waiting for me'_

The light focused on Luffy, no longer flashing or faltering but taking over his surroundings entirely.

_"That's it? That's as far as you will go…"_

Luffy's eyes sprung open and he jumped to his feet.

Something struck his chest and flung him backwards, making Luffy hit the wall with enough force to dent it. The pain hit him hard and his head began to pound loudly as he coughed, crumbling to the deck.

A strike like that shouldn't have been able to hurt Luffy as much as it did.

_"I was correct in my assumption. You are weak, Monkey D. Luffy"_

Luffy hissed and got up to his knees before looking around. The lighthouse was now granting the deck its unwavering light but the unnatural shadows were still thick enough to hide anything, or anyone, within them.

"Give me my crew back or I am going to kick your ass!" Luffy growled and carefully searched the deck from end to end, looking for the source of the loud, rumbling voice that sounded awfully familiar to him.

Luffy's head felt like it could be splitting open at any second.

_"For all it's worth, you could just kick your own - you're the one who let go and watched them fade away in the first place. Not me"_

Luffy's fists clenched as he gritted his teeth, not saying anything back. He had followed that line of thinking before, ever since the moment Robin disappeared right before his eyes, but he wasn't going to let himself fall for this _entity_ 's tricks. He wasn't going to lose himself now.

There was too much at stake.

 _"But I am offering you a rare show of kindness... Usually at these seas not many escape but I have followed your journey and chosen to give you chance"_  

The words followed by a hollow laugh that made every hair on the back of Luffy's neck stand up. 

_"_ _I've seen sailors of all sides be broken, fleeing these seas for a life on land. I've seen them die, killed by forces such as myself_

_"There have been people stronger than you, easily destroyed and forgotten due to their imaginary invincibility. I am tired of it... And that is why I have chosen to give you this warning, instead of taking you down"_

"And what good is that supposed to be", Luffy spat out, backing closer against the splintered wall behind him. He lifted his left hand against his temple as the pain was getting worse the louder the _entity_ 's voice became.

_"You and your crew are too weak for the battles ahead of you... You have made yourselves into targets that the world is not going to let slip by"_

Luffy tried to come up with something to say to deny those words but his experiences the closer to the Red Line they came had already shown the danger the whole crew was facing. Denying it would be idiotic, no matter how reckless of a man he was. But he must still do his best for the sake of the whole crew and their dreams:

"I am their captain and I will make sure they -!"

_"They are your crew, your friends, your family - they would do anything for you, too. You can never predict who makes the sacrifices, and you already know some of them are beginning to follow down that path..._

_"On these seas, there is little difference between how much one person can give for the sake of others before it comes down to their life. If you continue on this journey unprepared, none of you will last for long"_

The voice sighed and Luffy closed his eyes as the pain grew more and more difficult for him to stand. "T-that's not…"

_"Everyone's luck runs out at some point; doesn't matter whose name and will you are carrying with you"_

The voice was shifting, beginning to turn into a whisper with each new word it said, and Luffy reopened his eyes as his headache started to decrease along with it. He could see a light, _a shadow_ , stand by the swing but he didn't feel like attacking it. The shadow was _hollow_ , the darkness it wove from its fingers smooth and beautiful.

"What do you want.. from me..?"

Luffy couldn't tell if the _shadow_ was laughing or crying, the sound of it so silent as it tilted, folding into itself and becoming one with the nothingness around it. Carefully, Luffy straightened his posture and looked around. He felt beaten, defeated, alone.

_'That can't be it, all this couldn't have been just for -'_

_"If you wish for this to have been just a dream, then that's all it was.The rest is up to you, once you wake up"_

Luffy was no longer sure if the whispers were coming from somewhere around him, or from within his own head, his own mouth.

"Why?"

_"Because I know what you can become and I wish to see the world burn, the sea set ablaze"_

The light of the lighthouse began to turn again, creaking silently as the mist swallowed the ship in seconds. Luffy felt a pair of _hands_ softly land on his shoulders and didn't try to slip away from them for once. The hold didn't have any real strength but Luffy knew it could crush him easily if it wanted to -

Surprisingly, Luffy found the presence of this _entity_  to no longer feel like a threat.

_"Your crew is safe, for now. They will forget their nightmares and move on but you must remember: Reality cannot be left behind. You cannot escape your decisions"_

The hands let go of him and Luffy leaned against the wall tiredly. Now he was certain that he recognized the voice, no matter how different it had sounded. He wondered if he'd end up following its advice, back in his own reality.

 

* * *

 

This time there was no suffocating darkness as the mist around him was wiped away by a soft breeze. Luffy closed his eyes and calmly breathed in while the nothingness released its hold on his pained mind.

Luffy fell asleep, certain now that the next time his eyes were to open, it would be aboard the real Thousand Sunny and surrounded by his crew.

They were going to be all right.

 


	6. Five days

_He woke up on his bed only to find the quarters empty. At first he panicked, thinking that just like last time he'd find no-one anywhere._

_But thankfully that was not the case._

_W_ _hen he entered the kitchen, the entire crew was there and almost done with their breakfast, most stuffing their faces as fast as they could in the fear of him rushing in and stealing their share. They looked up at him questioningly and he mustered up a grin, hiding away both the shock and relief taking him over._

 _Everything was as it should be and it didn't take long for him to get used to the peace; t_ _here was no mist, only some light rain as they sailed. Still, while_ _it didn't take long for him to start forgetting the details of his dream, there were feelings left behind that remained fresh in his heart._

_For one, the fear of losing his crew he couldn't let go of._

 

* * *

 

Luffy had had a busy day -

First he had played with Chopper, then stolen some meat from Sanji, spent a lot of time with Franky, Usopp, and their new inventions, and sung together with Brook. Then he moved along to cheer up Zoro by giving him some useless advice which ended with Chopper ushering their captain away while yelling at the swordsman to not train while injured. And after all that, Luffy had gotten beat up by Nami for accidentally breaking a tea cup Sanji had just bought her - thankfully she didn't tell the cook about it.

All in all Luffy spent his day, just like all others before it, with his whole crew, desperate to not let any of them out of his sight for too long. It wasn't surprising that it was Robin who noticed his strange behavior, the slip of anxiety in activities that he usually played off with glee.

Robin decided to bring this up when she noticed Luffy had stopped listening to her talk about the famous pirates from days long past but still hadn't run off. He sat cross legged on the ground and stared past Sunny's railing, somewhere far beyond the horizon.

In his mind, Luffy pondered over forgotten fears left by a dream, one he couldn't quite remember. This dream had left its mark with silent whisper he could still hear in repeat every time closed his eyes, not quite able to make out what was being said.

Robin had fallen quiet, closing the book in her hands as she watched her clearly troubled captain.

"Luffy... If there's something on your mind, I am more than happy to listen."

Luffy's head sprung around and he focused his eyes on Robin, only then realizing that he hadn't heard a word she had said earlier. It was a shame really as he loved her stories. Still, he tried to act as if there was nothing wrong and smiled happily, trying to mask his discomfort.

Robin's gaze on him was steady though, and Luffy had to give her something to break the silence. "How long will it take for us to get to the next island?"

"Let's see... We left early yesterday and, with the weather still in our favor, we should arrive to Dunlic early tomorrow morning. We were told the journey would take only a few days, three at most even with the bad weather the Florian Triangle brings to these parts", Robin answered casually without questioning the odd look on her captain's face.

Robin gave him more insight in her answer than was strictly necessary, and Luffy was thankful for that. He huffed and crossed his arms over his chest in deep thought. "I could have sworn it would take five days…"

Robin smiled and didn't say anything, only waited for Luffy to talk if he so wished to. She picked up another book and began to browse through it.

Luffy tilted his head from side to side, trying to remember some other details of his dream, anything that would help him leave it behind for good. He didn't come up with anything specific but he felt like he should still say something more to not make Robin worry.

"And in a few more days, we will reach the Red Line and head for the New World!"

"Indeed, and that is why I find these smaller islands we visit before the Line very interesting. No-one knows what we might find", Robin said as she wrote a few lines worth of corrections on the book in her hands.

Luffy's eyes widened slightly at her words and Robin acted as if she hadn't noticed, silently studying his reaction. But Luffy only shook his head to get rid of the feeling of a coming flashback he decided he didn't want to have after all.

Instead, Luffy got up from the ground with an honest grin appearing on his face.

"I can't wait to see what we'll find in the New World!" Luffy exclaimed and then thanked Robin. The archeologist looked after him as he hurried off, and frowned. Something was wrong but she might never know what.

Luffy was one of those people that rarely spoke of things that affected him deeply, and pushing him would do no good. All Robin could do was to be there for him and make sure he was okay.

 

* * *

 

The Dunlic the crew arrived to the next morning was colorful and lively, with plenty of wildlife to be found almost everywhere. There was no lighthouse, Luffy noticed in confusion, wondering why he had expected to see one.

The citizens at Dunlic did prove to match their reputation and had only a few words to spare and mostly in an attempt to fight the pirates away. None of the crew members wanted to stay on the off-putting island for too long.

And so, right after the Log Pose had had its few hours to set, they were ready to leave. Luffy found himself incredibly happy to watch the island disappear as they sailed towards their next destination.

As Dunlic disappeared completely in the horizon and became nothing but an uninteresting memory with nothing to offer, Luffy quickly forgot every last strand of his dream and returned fully to his carefree routines.

 

* * *

 

In the end, it didn't take long for Luffy to recall the warning he had been given.

It was already too late by then.

Unable to get to the Fishman Island without the necessary preparations, it took them exactly five days to reach Sabaody Archipelago after leaving from Dunlic. Once there, the limit of the Straw Hat crew's strength was truly proven.

Luffy was once again forced to watch as his crew disappeared, one by one, leaving him alone with his realization as the whispers in his head became clear:

_"Reality cannot be -"_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Have to admit, this fic has changed a lot along the way -- I might do a rewrite/sequel and explain the plot and setting a bit better --", from the original Author's Note I finished OIWU with in 2013.  
> Some kind of a rewrite did happen, finishing years later because I completely forgot to post the last few chapters. But getting to re-experience this fic turned out to be great and I do feel like I've learned something from doing this!


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